Rocks And Reaching Out

My family loves rocks...

When Micah and I began dating, it didn't take me long to realize his love of rocks.

He had a rock-tumbler in his garage, and a tray of smooth, beautiful rocks that he would let family and friends pick from when they visited his house. He'd also drag me along on his rock climbing adventures...

And I would pretend that I cared...

('Cause isn't that what dating is all about?!)

And now our children love rocks!

Rock climbing and collecting are pretty normal family activities for us...

This was our most recent rock exploring day...

Family days like this always cause me to do a great deal of reflecting.

I tend to think about how far I've come over the past ten years, and about everything being married and having a family has taught me.

I had a reader/friend suggest to me once that I write more about my experiences of having a step-son.

I considered what she said.

I understand there is a need for support among families with step-children.

It is a difficult life.

Unless you've walked the road, there's no way you can understand.

But there's a reason why I've never written about Micah's son on this blog.

He's an adult now, has moved away, and I want to respect his privacy. 

BUT!

If you are walking this road and need someone to talk to who understands,

Please Reach Out!

I would LOVE to chat privately if that would help you!

I did have one reader do this fairly recently. She sent me a message saying, "I know you don't know me but would you be willing to meet with me? Like you, I married a man with a son and I think you'd be a good resource for me..."

I've met her for coffee a couple of times now, and it is such a blessing to talk with her!

We understand each other! Haha!

With all of that being said however, I am always more than happy to write about what I have learned through the difficulty. Because I love telling about how God showed up for me and got me through it!

Are you struggling with something in your marriage?

The best advice that I could possibly give, and the attitude that became my personal motto when things were rough, is to (no matter what happens) Just Stay In It! Literally, and emotionally. (Because it's easy to shut your heart down when it's hurting.)

Literally ~ As in physically stay in the marriage, be present in the home, and show up to events you'd rather back out of. 

And emotionally ~ As in keep your heart open, keep loving, and keep praying for restoration. 

When I resolved at the time to just stay in it, I didn't know how or even if God would bless me for it. But I knew enough at least to know that running from my problems wasn't the answer.

Now all these years later I can tell you what I've learned...

Just because something is hard doesn't mean it's bad for you or you shouldn't do it.

Sometimes the right thing to do, is the hard thing to do!

So, when I would call out to the Lord for help saying, "I can't do this. It's too hard!" He would whisper back, "I am with you. I will never leave you or forsake you." (Duet. 31:6)

When I would cry, "But I'm not cut out for this. I'm too weak!" He would whisper back, "My power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9)

And when I would plead, "Please show up here, God!" He would answer, "I will stand at your side and give you strength." (2 Tim. 4:17)

Now all these years later I can testify that He did!

And I am enjoying the fruit of my decision...

"He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand." Ps. 40:2b

You know, I must admit that I've grown to have a fondness for rocks now, too!

I like to collect the heart-shaped ones...

Display them in my garden...

And tell all of YOU how "The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge." Ps. 18:2

xo,

~ Courtney ~